Thursday, 10 October 2013


Oya told him to tell me.
I didn't listen, he said she said.
She threw her back and laughed and laughed, she just knew i'd be back in tears no less, wishing time could reverse.
'Not in these times' he said she said, 'look clearly for the next test thrown, or you will repeat it!'
Remember lamide from your school.
I shuddered wide eyed. wouldn't

She might, she might not...i'm not so sure now.

Monday, 23 September 2013

3 CAKES - A personal new year, same but very different...It is lengthy! What? It's my birthday!

I was about to express my shock that the girls would be late.

The 'plan' was for us to have a meal, to do with the wedding. Girlfriend S gets married in a week.
I was dressed up as it was going to be me my birthday celebration. Well the pub part anyway. Before I get to the shock of the day. Let's go to the morning. I and a group of other friends, arranged by V, went laser tagging. Like paintballing, minus the pain. No bruised skins thank you very much. I am way too old for that!



I pack some clothes and shoes, I'm smiling because, well just because. It's my birthday soon, as in twelve hours soon! And it is going to be a great day.
By 10.30 am, I have left the house, the beauty of London and its travel system is that, one never knows what kind of day it will be.
Now that I live on the District line, it feels like lottery. Win if the trains are fully running, almost loose if not. I win today!
I got to North Greenwich quickly. I was over half an hour early. Ah well, walked around and wondered what changes tomorrow. Will I feel some magic dust on my forehead, or will I turn in to some swan lol. As I got there, a friend was already there with her sister. Soon two more ladies, then a male friend. We had to get to the Laser arena as our time set.

I was getting excited now! Is this how army folks feel? I wondered silently. All week it'd rained mostly. Today (Saturday) felt warm in comparison, and mostly it was dry too! Yay British weather.
We had two people unable to make it, so there were ten in total. We got in the friends cars (two total), and headed there ASAP. Upon arrival, after fooling around taking pictures, changed in to some horrible looking jumpsuit. Ah well, just as well this is not lfw. Or we'd be stoned with water filled balloons for sure. We got briefed, split in to two teams. Green team vs. Red team. I was with the latter.

ROUND ONE - Lasted about 15 - 20 minutes. Though it felt longer. Basically, you shoot the light of the opposite team. If hit, the light goes white on your body armour. Yes, I got hit a fair amount of times. Just as well I never joined the armer eh. I did get some hits in though!
My team won this round over all.
ROUND TWO - There were some late comers who were not part of our group but could play too. We acquired some smart kids and their parents split equally. So round two was the same, get white lights on the opposite team as much as possible. Again Green won out this round. I know we were brilliant, much to the chagrin of my friends in the Red team hehehe.
ROUND THREE - Find the flag - This was confusing, but I didn't mind once I heard one of the smart kids had the flag, we had to protect him and make sure the reds did not find his hiding place and keep passing it among the greens. Also, the ammunition in the guns died quicker. Imagine being shot whilst at the charging station, it was hilarious!
ROUND FOUR - Everyone for their selves! This was horrid, I really did not want to have to shoot any greens, but if I didn't I’d wound up shot. Nope! So like a crazed person we all ran charging toward each other. Sweaty, dust covered afro, dirtied knees and shoes. Ah well, I found R and I shot her on instinct and she shot back.
I gasped, she said 'I wasn't going to shoot you, till you shot be first' after that we covered each other till a red took me as a body shield. It was funny and really silly.
My friends are funny and pretty good people.
RESULTS - Green team won. The end! And the overall winner was a green team member; we'd met her there too. She was with 2 friends who were Reds. Then the family too, whom we had equally. I think in total there were 25 of us.


After changing back to normal clothes, we got back in the cars and headed out.
We went to the Newham Waterfront festival by The Royal Docks.
Part of our group went to the wrong water front. Needless to say, they'd be another hour meeting us!
Though it was more of a family event, we had fun and walked around, attempted to hula hoop. R and P were good, her sister, B and myself? Abysmal and so funny in attempt!
Soon the Mc announced the lessons were over. Just as well, I was a tad crap at it.
We walked around some more, checking out the variety of food, from burgers to noodles and all sorts. Starving from all that running around, the five of us had some chips and burgers. Ohh it was so good. Eventually, the lost team came to join us; there were many hilarious versions of why they wound up at the waterfront pool in South East London, than where we were. Enh, we laughed and carried on goofing, taking pictures and checking out the scenery and live music. We found a restaurant and had drinks there.
Here we were, catching up. Another friend who didn't make the event came quickly to give me a card and a gift. It was sweet. She couldn't stay as she had other birthday celebrations to attend. Ah well, at least she came briefly. By six pm, we began to disperse. I was meant to go for a meal at the bride to be S's house. So went to V's to shower and change clothes.
I wanted to wear black, but I was told abruptly by B, P and my lil sis 'it ain't a funeral y'know!' then they proceeded to choose from my bag.
I wore a purple skirt with a print boob tube top in the end.


I got to V's and showered, after much fiddling got the hot water going, it made me remember the first year I lived back home without my mum, I was useless at first. It took me ringing international and frantic texts to figure out how to set it. Tale for another day ha.
So I eventually got ready and I left for S's house.
I am usually quick with makeup, but I was scared of being late for the dinner that I thought we were to have, I finished my makeup on the train. I remembered to take the print out I needed to show her, took a fan (much needed! Dancing, you understand) and was on my way. It would take me about 40 minutes to get to hers.

I was excited as I had had an amazing day, I was also contemplative, and in less than 3 hours I’d be a year older. Not just ANY ole year. 30!
We were going to the pub, they were, and I’d meet them after the wedding meeting. I got lost as I walked the same road from the same station I'd been to many times. It's the most annoying thing for me, but it happens, I’ve been there before. So I’m lost why? How? Hehehehe.

Finally I get there. And, just as I was about to express my shock that the girls would be late. As that meant meeting V later than planned. S was saying how only one person had shown up yet. I sighed wryly and I opened the living room door to screams and poppers of SURPRISE! Goodness! I began to cry, I was so shocked, fucking hell!. I cannot believe I didn't see that coming. They got me good!
I mean, it's been a mad year, of funerals, births and marriages. Life i suppose no? To be honest actually, I was already content with Laser earlier. But, the absence of some of the folks made perfect sense. They were busy putting up pictures, arranging snacks and wrapping my presents.

I was moved more than words can ever say, I don't think I’ve done it justice...I have amazing people in my life. FACT! It's a lot, it's a lot for real.

Just when it was all sinking in, dancing and chattering. Some two hours later, S brought out the cake. As if she and the girls didn't already do enough! It was a pink cake, and then she proceeded to rub my face with it. Naturally! It looked like I had on a mask, if I had a boyfriend / husband, I’m sure that'd have been fun for him lol.

I re-did my makeup, and not long after more dancing. About 1 am, V said we were meant to go to a club too. Not everyone could come with. But I still had fun. Once there, a friend from early came to join, as well as P who was in on the whole thing. They all were but me! And I am normally the one who does know it all. Well, S has always promised 'one day we will shock you, watch!'

And as I azontoed and Oliver twisted my way into the fabulous 30 years of age. Many people have been asking all year how I feel about being this age, and my answer is the same as it was in January and last week and three days ago. Alright actually, I don't know how I’m 'supposed' to feel / be. I just know that I am glad there is life in me.

So there it is - surprise party!


On my actual birthday, after I woke dragged myself up. I woke my sister, we'd stayed at V's, and as it was closest to the club we went to. And no I didn't take a 17 yr old to the club hehehe. I'd be dead. It's my birthday but, ma would not be that cool lol. We finally made it to hers for 1 pm. We saw her on our way in.
After the initial hugs, before my sister could say 'jack sparrow', ma goes, 'did you drink?', then both looked at me. For my part, I said yes, she had one.
Then she goes, 'we'll talk about this later, I see you are practicing for your 18th' I chuckled inside.

We were flat out once in at mum's. So tired, I wanted to sleep but I was too excited, then I saw the cake. It was huge! Eeeek 3rd cake. This was epic!
Mummy dearest baked it - aaaahhhh, I had been teasing my sister at the festival, whether she baked for me. Wow.

I felt feel so blessed, to have seen a new year of life. Ahhh, we had cake for dinner. #Whatface hehehehe. I LOVED IT.

I was sad as my brother and dad were in town from Cologne, only for that night, but we didn't end up meeting. I didn't know anything of my birthday outside of the laser part. Plans did not go accordingly and I missed them. I guess I have to make the trip to Germany hey. Any excuse to travel! #timetobookflights

Pictures coming soon. Kisses and thank you!

Tuesday, 10 September 2013

Unnamed - 3 am 9th April

He said

‘I found the Oya to my Shango’
In ancient times of folklore
She was his wife
Then his mistress, then his mother
So the legend goes
Either way, of these three things
I’m out of. Trinity
I saw in him, greatness
One you see in a loved best friend
Of course
This meant my Oya
Now had no Shango
In my reasoning
I could never be those things
Not mother
Well maybe, just not one
Who births her lover
So the legend goes
Besides, Freud lives no more
Not mistress, that’d be a distress
Wife, I’d consider and add
Lover. In my reasoning
This holds one thing. Mother.
Maybe to the next to come
From between us – a mesh of body, writhing spirits and soul
None of these three I am
In ancient times, when the gods walked the earth
She was his wife, mother, mistress
He said ‘I found the Oya to my Shango’
I turned to see
She was an echo of me
A reverb scratching a screeching noise
Into my conscious
Like Yemoja’s curse, I might die
This restlessness
An echo of me I thought she was
And I hear you
That line was a low blow
I admit I aimed for the jugular in zigzag blows
I looked at this Oya to his Shango
My oya spoke ‘let her go, release them both’
Burning eyes
Tears about to fall
Akin to raging hail stones
Held back as I fled
Into the night
Erzulie beside me
Always there
Saying nothing

Wednesday, 4 September 2013's been a minute

So i haven't blogged in a while.

I've been alive. Yep obviously hehehe. And yes still writing, but i am biting the proverbial 'bullet' and adding tiny bits on here.

But, i wanted to come back so i can share stuff in one go.

Also, when i delete fb i can have note to self over here.

So, what have i been up to since 09. Well, we don't have all day. But, i will say it's been interesting a journey the past 4 years.

I have an idea to start a 'what tee wore x day' and one for purple snood.

The site is in progress as we speak! Here's a sneak peak on

Not sure how it will work, but it means i will have to post images of me up. I already have enough of that from modeling, I'm not on that at min.

We'll see hey?
What else, i'm working still, different agency but I model now and again as always.
What else, yeah i am single too. So you know, if you know anyone looking for someone fabulous, point them to moi. Ok, that's be a a tad creepy.

Oohhh maybe, i will do one about hair, then again there are so many natural hair blogs now it is ridiculous! I love loads of them though.
My afro as much as i love her (she's a 'she' most days, reminds me of me) i don't feel warrants so much of my words.
I bet you i will eat my words. Once i get carried away!

So yeah, all a work in progress - watch, let's see what happens.